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did you miss anything?
close of 2003 - 2003-12-31
georgian grapes? in russian wine? - 2003-12-29
i'm gonna wash that database right outta my hair - 2003-12-23
acetone and toluene - 2003-12-22
grilled cheese in my future - 2003-12-21

11:03 a.m.

so iíve, yet again, entered my phase of being dissatisfied with everything in my life. iíll be going along fine, and then--wham!--everything sucks and the life i have is not the life i want. last night, i told bill that this isnít the kind of life that i wanted when i was younger. i never envisioned my life turning out this way. when he asked me what kind of life i did want, i couldnít answer him. maybe i donít really know what i want. maybe i do know what i want but think itís not realistic and hell, who gets the kind of life they want anyway? i guess i thought my life would be somehow, well, cooler and more fun. i hardly ever see any of my friends that live around here. i hardly talk to my friends that donít live around here. i feel as if i seldom try anything or go anywhere new. i think my job could be more fulfilling and i could be doing something more creative. i donít know if my dissatisfaction is real or perceived. would i be happier if things were different, or would i still have something to bitch about?

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